1) If you were drafted into the military but could pick your branch, which would you choose? Explain why.I’d be outta here. There is no possibility that I’d been in the military. I mean besides the fact that I’m fucking 260 years old. I would have been over the Canadian border so fast, Uncle Sam’s head woulda spun. Unless,of course, I just had to do a radio show like Robin Williams. Then it would be, “Goooooooooooood Morning, Vietnam! And welcome to it!”

2) What was the last thing you made from scratch in the
kitchen? Diet Coke. I even added the ice without assistance.

3) Why did your parents give you your first name? I’m a “Jr.”4) Show and Tell. What comes to mind first when you see this
picture? Or, tell a story if it reminds you of one. 

My take: This fucker needs Jenny Craig.

give you spiritual awareness.