WTIT: The Blog

76) In your opinion, what makes a great relationship?For a guy, you gotta know the infamous “Six words you must say often” as heard first on WTIT. They are: “I’m sorry, my fault, you’re right!”77) How did/could someone win your heart? Each case is different, but generally there is alcohol and craziness involved.

78) In your world, what brings on more creativity? Chanting to the Gods of Humor.

 79) What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far? Giving a mulligan.

80) Why did you break up with your last ex? This was on last week’s fucker. Sorry, I missed it.

81) What would you want to be written on your tombstone? “Drink to me, drink to your health, you know I can’t drink anymore.” Or “Keep off the grass”. It’s really a toss up.

82) What is your favorite word? Fucktardian.

83) Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word: delusional. The Republican agenda.

84) What is a saying you use a lot? “Don’t make it healthy.” I say that when they ask if I want a lemon with my Smirnoff rocks.

85) Are you watching Idol this season? If yes, how do you like it? Yes. So far, a great deal. I think JLo and Tyler do a great job.

86) Were you surprised that House got canceled? No, but disappointed. But, the show jumped the shark when he drove his car into Cutty’s house.

87) If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be? If only it were that simple. There are far too many bad people.

88) What is your current desktop picture? It’s the 2011 WTIT DJ pic.

89) What would be a question where you’d not tell the truth? Over the years I’ve noticed that there’s no good way to answer, “Do I look fat in this dress?”

90) One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by WEEPING ANGELS. The Weeping Angles aren’t really doing anything, they’re just standing around your bed. What would you do? Go back to sleep. Clearly I’m not awake.

91) You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power? Flight. It would make my sales route a fuck of a lot quicker.

92) You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be? My first marriage. Although, I’d still would have to have my kids.

93) You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again? My first night with the French twins. They knew how to welcome a neighbor! They are still pissed that I moved away.

94) You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. (let’s say that you are both single and available) Who might it be? Jill Hennessy. I’m nothing if not consistent. And yes, she started as a singer. She had a CD out in 2010 called Ghosts in the Attic. It’s quite good. She performed with the revival of The Lilith Fair that year.

95) You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go? Liverpool.

You betcha!

96) Who’s winning the U.S. Republican presidential nomination? Why? Sarah Palin. Because they all suck moose and she’s a lot hotter than, say, Newt.

97) Do you have any relatives or friends in jail? I know. What a fucking question. But I had to rewrite SO many I left this in. Can you imagine the reaction if I had left in “Spit out or swallow”? (True.)

98) Who’s winning the next U.S. Presidential election? Obama will win big.

99) If the whole world were listening to you right now, what would you say? Give peace a chance. See you soon, unless we get a better offer.