
Monday Mayhem: Explain This To Me
Harriet’s Mission Statement: Explain to me why:
1. Late people in a movie theater always make noise and sit in front of me. Time to stop wearing that neon jumpsuit to Harry Potter movies..
2. Why people choose to walk in the street rather than use the sidewalk. Radicals. They might have heard Areosmith’s Walk This Way.
3. Why teens in pictures on Facebook always have to hold a red cup to prove they are cool. They all have to prove to their folks that they’re drug free to use facebook. The red cup is what the have to pee into.They feel anything but cool.
4. Why there could be nobody in line for the bathroom until you need to go. How long a minute lasts depends on which side of the door that you’re on. Bud’s Laws #13.
5. Why some Walmart’s have up to 100 check out lanes. I begging you please, stop going to Walmart. The store sucks moose and you are always (rightfully so) complaining about it.
6. Why they always need re-adjusting or scratching. It’s your body’s way of reminding you that you gotta pay attention.
7. Why people go 30mph in the left lane in a 45 zone. I always assume they’re stoned. I’m usually right.
8. Why people in congress are getting a raise. If you can vote on your own raise, explain to me why you’d vote “no”.
9. Why people on bicycles think they can weave through traffic and ignore lights and stop signs. I think they have a death wish. Most of their graves say, “The driver didn’t see me. Pass the salt.”
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Kathy took me apple picking. There was no Smirnoff. Do the math. Was I happy or what? No, this has nothing to do with anything. Great pic, no? |
10. Why computers like to tell you they need to be restarted only when you are in the middle of doing something important. Does anything anybody does on the computer really all that important? I’m just thrilled that your fucking websites don’t crash anymore. You’ve been in a great mood for a long time.
You know- I haven't been to Walmart in over a month but, I have to go because they are the only ones who have a fish filter that I need. I really dread going too…Love the picture of Kathy. Thanks for playing and have a great week!!!!!
Harriet-I can imagine…