2. “I might be just twenty-six, but I’m an old woman in disguise… twenty-six goin’on sixty-five.” Have you ever felt that you were either older or younger, for your age at that time? Great question. Now we are going to read a bunch of fuckers that will tell us that everyone guesses them ten years younger. I swear I could do a Dating Profiles Meme with ten people explain that they are told this everyday. Why does no one realize that people tell you that you look younger to be nice? I know I didn’t answer the asinine question. It’s a fucktardian question, anyway. Oh, and now you can look 10 years younger for a price.
3. “I think the hardest thing is losing weight. That’s the hardest thing more than anything else.” Have you had trouble losing weight? No. I weigh what I weighed in 8th grade. Holy moly Jodi! The questions are actually dumbing down The Blog. I didn’t even think that was possible. Of course, weight is a bitch to lose. It’s because unlike quitting say smoking, you still have to eat.
4. “Being a singer is a natural gift.” Do you have any natural gifts? You don’t to do threesomes if you are not gifted. While I know a lot of readers feel I exaggerate, my experiences in some areas are wilder than my tales. Oh yea, people bring up the French twins and go “aha!” I mean really. You only know what I want you to know. At last count I’ve used pictures of close to a hundred different sets of twins. Yet, I still get asked, “But are they real?”
5. “I always felt rock and roll was very, very wholesome music.” What the most “wholesome” rock artist that you like? Another gem. I swear I could write a better meme if I just made up some random person. Wouldn’t it be great if I could say, “Look, Janera. I made you up. Write better questions or I’ll delete you and let my virtual dog Happy fucking write it.” Oh, the answer. I think it’s Creed. I loathe Christian rock, but I love that band.
6. “I sing to the realists; people who accept it like it is.” Are you a realist? I’m a cynic. And recently Nurse Exec said that they realists and cynics are the same thing. I can’t improve on that.
7. “No one loves a party more than I. I am a people person.” Do you like to party or are you more of a homebody? Do you think I get invited to a lot of party? Gees. Pay attention. Your friends get a tad pissed and stop inviting you to their parties when you convince their wives to do a threesome with you and another friend’s wife. I don’t they care much that I do them, but when they do something that the husband could never get them to do, there is anger. Go figure.
8. “I’m gonna make a gospel record and tell Jesus I cannot bear these burdens alone.” Do you feel the need to share your burdens? Not to ghosts or gods. I think believe that Happy could accomplish more. But if you are asking about lovers and friends, I can whine we the best of them.
9. “I’m the lady next door when I’m not on stage.” Do you know the lady next door? (yes, you can pick either side.) I only have one side. We say hello, but I have no clue what her name is. And the twins, my neighbor’s wife and some woman on ludes that knocked on my door all live upstairs.
10. “I never felt inferior or less than. I was blessed to grow up in a environment where self-worth was underscored.” Do you ever feel inferior? Just fucking blow me. What the fuck do you think? That’s all folks. You can hit “next blog” now. Happy Hump Day. Join us on Thunking.
We should be Thunking.
WTIT: The Blog will be back.
Whether you are ready or not.
Same time. Same blog. Peace.