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All posts for the month May, 2010

Can’t Get Enough of Your Love

Posted by Bud Weiser, WTIT on May 31, 2010
Posted in: sunday stealing. 27 Comments

Welcome again to Stealing which we bring you weekly on The WTIT Blog. We have gotten really good at just stealing a meme from someone else’s post. (You can play thismeme with Judd and click on theofficial Sunday Stealing meme.) Today we ripped off this meme from a blogger named Demonaduerre from the blog Because I Still Love You. He does not remember where he grabbed it.. But it was probably stolen there as well. So, of course, that will be as far as we go. Tracing back our theft’s thieves might take some time. All meme questions are in bold.

Cheers to all of us thieves!

Sunday Stealing: The Just Because Meme

1. Make a list of 5 things you can see without getting up. The French twins are over. I can see the top of Michelle’s head. Or is it MaBelle? I’ll get back to you in a bit. There’s a Smirnoff glass, from last night. Some woman’s panties are on my chair. Somewhere there’s a woman catching a breeze. There’s the iPod playing Barry White’s Can’t Get Enough of Your Love. It always puts Michelle in the mood. Or is it MaBelle? Number five are the blinds. It’s way too light in here. I really should have slept last night, I guess.

2. How do you style your hair? How often do you cut it? Kathy convinced me to shave my beard off. Now she’s talking about that debonair bald look. I swear at this rate she’ll get me to dive into a Nair tank.

3. What are you wearing now? Well, I usually wear my WTIT thong but my neighbor’s wife borrowed it when her husband stopped over so he wouldn’t think she was naked. It wasn’t her brightest plan. Man does that dude can get pissed. I’m wearing my Abbey Road tee shirt and a smile.

4. What’s your occupation? Do you like it? I’m still keeping Massachusetts safe from sobriety. I’m also learning how to make drinkable coffee for my lady. She actually threw a can of Maxwell House at me. I can take a subtle hint. I now serve her Dunkin’ Donuts fresh roast.

5. When was the last time that you took a nap? Was there a special reason? I don’t usually take naps. But I do pass out on occasion.

6. Who was the last person you hugged romantically? Can I get three guesses?

8. What was the last full meal that you ate? I took my lady to the nicest restaurant in the area. It’s called Jonathan Pasco’s. I had very well done prime rib that I ordered rare. The waitress apologized profusely. The good part was when I got the check. My meal was comped.

9. What was the last email that you received? I got this ad about some little blue pills that can increase my genital package’s stamina. Wow. Who knew?

10. What one website do you always visit when you go online? I still go to Random Boredom everyday. I keep think maybe she’d let me back in. I guy can dream can’t he?

11. What was the last significant thing you bought? My son, the rock star’s new EP. The band is So Long Davey. Please do yourself a favor and download it from Amazon. Click here.

12. What musical artist did you not get at first, but then became a fan? Hootie and the Blowjobs.

13. What do you think about before you go to bed last night? I had company. You do the math.

14. What was the last CD you bought? John Mayer’s Battle Studies.

15. What is your favorite weather, and why? What’s the weather like today? I hate giving fucking weather reports. Can I just do the sports report?

16. If you could have a special artistic talent, what would it be? I’ve always wanted to have better penmanship when I pee my name in the snow.

17. Did you watch the Idol 9 finale? If yes, what are your thoughts? Yes. Thoughts? Lee won. Simon said goodbye. In three more questions I’ll say bye.

18. What’s something you’d like to say to someone right now? I’d like to say to Kathy that I could not love her more. yet, I will. I will love her more tomorrow. Can you hang on a sec? Thanks. She’s right here. Now she knows.

19. Any special plans for this (holiday in the States) weekend? Kathy and I are having a massive cookout. The twins be here. I love watching them eat wieners.

20. Besides your current S/O, who was the last person that you loved romantically? Jill Hennessy. Shhhh. Kathy doesn’t know about her.

That’s it for today on the
WTIT: The Blog.
Enjoy your Sunday.
We’re back with Mayhem.
Peace, my friends.
Join us. Same time. Same blog.

I’m Applying for Sainthood

Posted by Bud Weiser, WTIT on May 29, 2010
Posted in: Saturday 9. 16 Comments

Every Saturday WTIT: The Blog brings you a meme called Saturday 9. It’s not to say that this is a bright idea, but it is what we do. A woman named Crazy Sam started this meme because a prior popular Saturday meme specialist Lola had retired. So, Sam contacted all Lola’s participants and invited us to participate in her meme. The biggest difference is that Sam enjoys our participation. All of Sam’s questions and writing are in bold.

Saturday 9: Midnight Confessions

1. Have you ever had to confess something to a lover or friend? No. Believe it or not, I actually have never done anything wrong in my entire life. I’m glad I could type that sentence. I never could have attempted to verbalize it. My tongue might have even fallen off it’s roller.

2. How well do you handle rejection? It depends on the type. If we are talking about romantic rejection, I have never had a problem with it. It sucks, but you move on. But I do have problems when someone throws me out of their meme. I know. I gotta let go. I’m still working on it.

3. What makes you feel old? Going to the doctor and even after you insist on being called Bud, you get, “Then ‘Bud’ it is, Mr. Weiser.”

4. What makes you feel young? Recently it was falling in love. I neither expected the fall or the feeling.

5. What’s something you are old school about? I won’t text. I know, it’s stupid. But I use my phone for calls. I use my laptop if I need to email and I use my iPod for music. True story: I was at Verizon to have my phone fixed this week. They tried to sell me on a phone-blackberry-mp3 player thing. I responded that if I had this “smart phone” it would mean if my mp3 player broke I wouldn’t have a phone and I also couldn’t email until you fixed it. The guy just stopped talking. He finally stammered, “Good point.”

6. What TV show’s seasons would you buy on DVD? Tell us why it rocks. I own some shows that I’ve received as gifts. I really can’t think of one I really like having but M*A*S*H. But, if you’re buying one get me the Crossing Jordan complete series. I’d love it and now I can put Jill’s picture in my blog today.

7. If you could create your own TV channel, what would it be? The Threesome Zone. You’d expect anything else here on The Blog?

8. Where do you like to go for a day trip? Last weekend I did another picnic in the Berkshires. Until I decided to shatter my shin against a boulder. Ouch. Kathy took this rather great shot of the area. I got up and kicked the rock I am sitting on here about sixty seconds after this shot.

9. Name some things that you still want to do in your life. I honestly said a few times that I still wanted to fall in love again. I’m shocked that it’s happened. More so that she loves me. I am, how do they say it in the old country? Right, I am a handful. As far as things in my life, I’m not at all into possessions. Well, except my iPod. And my two computers. and my HDTV with surround sound. Other than that, I live a very sedate simple life. We will do Stealing tomorrow!

We’re glad that you stopped by today.
Enjoy your Memorial Day Weekend.
WTIT: The Blog will return tomorrow with
Judd Corizan and his
Naked Womens Polo Team.
Join us for Sunday Stealing!
Same time. Same blog.


Smells Like Bullshit

Posted by Bud Weiser, WTIT on May 29, 2010
Posted in: Dating Profiles. 11 Comments

Either you have used sites such as Match.com or Yahoo Personals or you’ve read them. Weekly, WTIT: The Blog scours those on-line dating sites to respond either ladies’ profiles or often their headlines as most of us would really like to do. (You can play this meme with Judd and click on the official The Dating Profile Meme!) The profile lines are inbold. Let the stupidity begin!

The Dating Profile Meme: So Little to Ask

1. A relationship that is rooted in God, commitment, unconditional love, unconditional respect, loyalty, mutual appreciation, mutual understanding, great communication, honesty, openness, accountability, faithfulness, compromise, mutual support, sharing, partnership, lots of fun, adventure, romance and great depths of intimacy is so little to ask for I think. Really. I think reading that crock of shit was way TOO much to ask for. But that’s just me.

2. I don’t usually like risks but becoming a single parent has shown me that I can be empowered to do things I would not have done in the past. Finally up for that threesome?

3. I am a full time college student, going on my fifth year. And only six more to go. Your folks must be SO proud. Why do it in the usually four? That’s too easy.

4. I enjoy walking the bike paths when weather is nice. Dodging those bikes must explain your girlish figure.

5. I am successful, intelligent, motivated and interested in finding some companionship. I “live in the moment”. I imagine those moments are a tad fleeting.

6. I will try to explain about my life, pesonality and what i think would be a good match however, i’m not one who likes talking about myself. Say not another word. Why spoil the mystery?

7. We must be good example in our society and you must be the one I will love forever because divorce is not an option for me again and once i decide to fall in love with someone, I will love with all i am and all i had. So, no real pressure, at all. You are my kinda gal!

8. I want to be able to go and talk with you if i am down or not in a good mood. That is what relationships are all about. Isnt it? My gut is that you are always down and never in a good mood? Ahhh. I know. Lucky guess.

9. My ideal match is someone who has a zest for life,someone who can have laugh and have fun but, and at the same time, they most be responsible. Or at least somewhat, ya know? Responsible? Not me. I’ve spent the last 258 years not growing up. You lost me at zest. Who says that shit anymore?

10. My imagination helps me to perceive the world. Desire to perceive the world, desire to create and desire to love – these are constituents of my life. If you had made even the slightest bit of sense you might actually be interesting. Go constitute yourself. And I mean that in the nicest possible way. We will do Crazy Sam tomorrow. Peace!

Thank you for dropping
by WTIT: The Blog today.
Next time we might be excellent.
Check that, we also might not.
Time will tell.
But doesn’t it always?
We’re back with Crazy Sam’s Saturday 9.
Join us Saturday. Same time. Same blog.

So Little to Ask

Posted by Bud Weiser, WTIT on May 28, 2010
Posted in: Uncategorized. Leave a comment

Welcome to The Dating Profiles Meme. This meme is based on a feature from WTIT: The Blog authored by Bud Weiser. This is a bit different than an “answer this question” meme. Either you have used sites such as Match.com or Yahoo Personals or you’ve read them. Weekly, we scour those on-line dating sites to respond either a person’s profile or often their headlines as most of us would really like to do. We use only “lines” that are gender-neutral. So, your mission is to respond to ten we choose each week. Seriously or with humor is your choice! The spelling or grammar errors were in the original profiles. Join us each and every Friday!

The Dating Profiles Meme: So Little to Ask

1. A relationship that is rooted in God, commitment, unconditional love, unconditional respect, loyalty, mutual appreciation, mutual understanding, great communication, honesty, openness, accountability, faithfulness, compromise, mutual support, sharing, partnership, lots of fun, adventure, romance and great depths of intimacy is so little to ask for I think.

2. I don’t usually like risks but becoming a single parent has shown me that I can be empowered to do things I would not have done in the past.

3. I am a full time college student, going on my fifth year.

4. I enjoy walking the bike paths when weather is nice.

5. I am successful, intelligent, motivated and interested in finding some companionship. I “live in the moment”.

6. I will try to explain about my life, pesonality and what i think would be a good match however, i’m not one who likes talking about myself.

7. We must be good example in our society and you must be the one I will love forever because divorce is not an option for me again and once i decide to fall in love with someone, I will love with all i am and all i had.

8. I want to be able to go and talk with you if i am down or not in a good mood. That is what relationships are all about. Isnt it?

9. My ideal match is someone who has a zest for life,someone who can have laugh and have fun but, and at the same time, they most be responsible. Or at least somewhat, ya know?

10. My imagination helps me to perceive the world. Desire to perceive the world, desire to create and desire to love – these are constituents of my life.

Thank you for playing this week on The Dating Profiles Meme. Please leave a comment or link when you have posted. Feel free to stop back and visit other player’s posts. Have a great week. Join us for Sunday Stealing. See you next Friday!

Every Rose Has Its Thorn

Posted by Bud Weiser, WTIT on May 27, 2010
Posted in: Thursday Thunks. 18 Comments

On Thursday WTIT: The Blog does a meme called Thursday Thunks that has been written by Berleen and Kimber. Now we’ve been added as part of the mix. What we’ve promised to Kimber and Berleen is that on our turn, we’d write my questions within the spirit of Thunks. All the meme questions are in bold.

Thursday Thunks: Hope It Gives You Ideas

The TT questions are brought to you by Kimber, the color of Bret Michaels’ bandana, and the number 8888.

1. Tomorrow you’ll be thinking to yourself? I can’t believe my neighbor came home a day early again. I mean, fair is fair. Keep to the fucking schedule if you don’t want to see me with your wife again.

2. Where’s your picket fence? I sold it for a bottle of Smirnoff.

3. With a big smile on your face, you do what? I say “Keep doing that babe, I gotta make this call…”

4. If I was to walk up to you, you’d do what? It’s a fucking long walk from Arizona. You are in Connecticut, why?

5. The list goes on and on. What list? Great twins I have known. (Or at least have seen their photos.)

6. Does every rose have a thorn or does every thorn have a rose? Brett and Casey James sang this on Idol last night. Every former Idol came back to send off Simon, except one. By just looking at her weight, my best guess was that Kelly Clarkson ate David Cook which would explain his absence. What was the fucking question?

7. Talk dirty to me. What kind of mop/vacuum/dust thingymabob do you use? You’d have to ask my hot housekeeper. It’s all magic to me.

8. Your Mamma don’t _______ and your Daddy don’t _______. Swallow and your daddy don’t stay home. It’s a cause and effect thing if you ask me.

9. Ever had a suitcase packed by your feet, and if so where were you going? I’m at the dark side of the road babe, where I’m bound I can’t tell. “Goodbye” is too good a word, babe. So I’ll just say fare thee well…

10. Have you ever ridden in a limousine? Yes. Of course. I’m a famous Tape Radio DJ.

11. I went to bed too soon and got up to ____? Her leaving. Boy, do women get cranky if you don’t complete the mission!

12. “And this last mile I travel with you”, to where? If you are traveling with me today, I’ll be at liquor stores. That last mile is when I return to Connecticut. Is it just me, or does Kimber seem a tad restless today?

That’s a Thursday at the Tape Radio Blog.
We hope we’ve made a valuable
contribution to The Blogosphere here.
We realize that is a lofty expectation.
WTIT: The Blog is back tomorrow.
Either way.
Join us for The Dating Profiles Meme.
Same time. Same blog.

Don’t Call Me Shirley

Posted by Bud Weiser, WTIT on May 26, 2010
Posted in: Wednesday Wickedness. 17 Comments

Welcome to Wednesday Wickedness on WTIT: The Blog. This meme appealed to us because of a twist in its concept. Each week Janera Jepson (its host) picks a celebrity. She digs up ten quotes from the person and asks her questions based on the quotes. Who would think someone would do something original? We didn’t see that coming. Anyway, she is a friend of Crazy Sam, so we are on board. Let’s do it. The quotes and meme questions are in bold.

Wednesday Wickedness: Simon Cowell

1. “If your lifeguard duties were as good as your singing, a lot of people would be drowning.” How well do you swim? I am an excellent swimmer. I passed all the Red Cross programs through Junior Life Guard. I stopped there because I thought it was a boring job. But the really reason behind the whole thing was that I’ve always wanted to bang a mermaid.

2. “I think he knows how to articulate something that people are entertained by and still be true to the message he’s trying to send, … very aware of himself.” How self aware do you think you are? I am very self aware. I know that I am not a day at the beach. My ex-wives would testify to that in court. In fact, I think they did. The fact that I have a beautiful wonderful GF is stuff that Ripley’s is made of. The pic is from an Indian restaurant that we hit this past weekend. We were going to do Thai, but when we arrived I asked if they had Smirnoff, a woman explained that they did and handed me a beer and wine menu. We were SO out of there.

3. “If you’ve got a big mouth and you’re controversial, you’re going to get attention.” Who has a big mouth that you like? I know this is an obvious answer, but Simon Cowell does and I think he’s great. For the record: Crystal out performed Lee badly last night. But Lee wins.

4. “I think you have to judge everything based on your personal taste. And if that means being critical, so be it. I hate political correctness. I absolutely loathe it.” Do you believe in political correctness? Only with a small percentage of issues. Mostly things like not calling folks with down’s syndrome Mongoloid. But for the most part I am with Simon on this one. Fuck ’em all if they can’t take a joke. Hey, when you do a blog that discusses blowjobs, you can’t really say that you are PC.

5. “I find Paula patronizing. It’s as simple as that. Paula is more damaging than I am to these contestants because a lot of people just shouldn’t be singing for a living.” Do you ever patronize people? Of course. The first ones that come to mind are my customers. It’s part of the gig. I don’t patronize friends, family or lovers. I did patronize the French twins once. I told them that they were the best threesome on the planet. Hey, I was trying to be nice!

6. “Not everybody is perfect, and I don’t think we should be looking for perfect people.” Do you or someone you know strive constantly to be perfect? My first ex-wife who is the mother of my four children was a depressed head case. It was caused by wanting to be perfect and falling short. In my view she fell WAY fucking short.

7. “I never want to hear that song again. I cannot stand it. I’m allergic to it.” What song are you totally sick of and why? Loving You by Minnie Ripperton. From the moment the birds tweet I wanna hurl.

8. “I like the fact that they’re cocky now from the age of four.” How old were you when you got cocky? What changed to make you so? Me? Cocky? Surely you jest. Yeah I know. “Don’t call me Shirley.” I was raised to be confident. The obnoxious part I added for ambiance.

9. “And there’s more open hostility among them because the competition is so intense.” When you compete with someone, have you ever gotten hostile? No. I don’t do a Kevin Garnet scowl. I compete hard, but hostile? Not really.

10. “Why are you having a normal conversation with him? This is a dairy farmer dressed as a woman.” Do you talk differently to someone because of the way that they are dressed? Anyone who says they don’t is a liar. I used to have a customer who looked like a hick, his desk was a mess pile on a mess. Fortunately by boss clued me in. He told me that the customer was as sharp as they come. He was right. I learned so much from the man until he retired a year or so ago. Happy Hump Day. Join us on Thunking.

That’s that for a Hump day.
We will return with something
equally fucktardian.
We should be Thunking.
WTIT: The Blog will be back.
Whether you are ready or not.
Same time. Same blog. Peace.

I’d Love to Watch

Posted by Bud Weiser, WTIT on May 25, 2010
Posted in: Monday Mayhem. 14 Comments

Welcome to Monday Mayhem! The place where nothing matters and we can all have fun on a Monday. Every week is something different. Today’s meme is the Gimme Your Best Response Meme. For each of the prompts, provide us with your best answer. All the meme questions are in bold.

Monday Mayhem: Gimme Your Best Response Meme

1. Are you putting on weight? You face looks fat. Your face looks ugly. I can lose weight. Try losing ugly.

2. You should wash your clothes in the expensive detergent. What you are using is not working. You should wash your body with better soap.

3. Are you sure you should be eating that piece of cake? You sure you like your nose?

4. You shouldn’t be friends with that person. I knew you had no clue about friendship.

5. That shirt is not the right color for you. Great. Buy me a new one. Surprise me.

6. Why would you work at that crappy job? You are confusing me with someone who’d actually want your opinion.

7. You’re not cutting your steak correctly. This is how you should be doing it. Better yet, you do it. I’d love to watch.

8. Is that all you do all day is sit on your computer? Harriet told me that everybody does it.

9. You should use Pledge on the dust in your house. You should use Pledge on the dust in your brain.

10. When are you going to get married/have kids/get divorced (choose which one relates to you)? I’d have to get pregnant first.

11. I’m thinking about staying at your house for 2 weeks for my vacation. I’ll be away then, no matter when you schedule it.

12. When you are at the store will you get me 2 pounds of bananas and some bread? Oh, and here is some money so you can buy my mother some eggs, prunes and Depends. I’ll need separate receipts of course. Blow me. And I mean that in the nicest way.

That’s a wrap on WTIT: The Blog for a Monday.
Sorry we were late to the party, yet again.
We will take a day off and return Wednesday.
We will joining the next
edition of Wednesday Wickedness.
Unless she throws us out, too.
Same time. Same blog.