Either you have used sites like Match.com or Yahoo Personals or you’ve read them. Weekly, WTIT: The Blog scours those on-line dating sites to respond either ladies’ profiles or often their headlines as most of us would really like to do. Please understand that we are not responding seriously or mean spiritedly. It is just the way we process the world. The spelling or grammar errors were in the original profiles. The profile statements are in bold. Let the stupidity begin!!

Hello, I’m a full figured woman and I enjoy the beach. Gotta watch out for those harpoons now, don’t you?

God saids “You will reap what you sow”. God does saids some weird dumb shit.

I try to catch dance performances. You must need one big mutha glove.

to bring a smile to my face
to bring out the butterflies in my stomach
to accept me with a daughter
to accept that I am working on launching my career
to make me laugh
to hold down a conversation about everything, anything, or nothing at all
to not be afraid to express himself
to be honest
to be respectful
to accept me as I am and not want to change a thing
to expose me to a world I have never been to
to give me a look and have his eyes tell me everything without saying a word
to be everything I want and not know that I was looking for it
to be able to get through reading this long description…
To hurl at your profile.

Im 5’4 and a little on the thick side. So if I talk really slow, will it be easier to understand?

Looking forward to meeting that one fun and honest new person to lighten up each other’s days. Oops, too late. That one fun and honest new person got married Saturday. We’re fresh out.

I hope, that sometime the success will turn to me. I very much hope will show me correctly way. Also I shall find the favourite the person. Using an online translation to English, aren’t you? Lucky guess.

BEEN THERE DOWN THAT. Then I guess you can let go of your ankles now.

What else do you wanna know? How long would I have to wait for a threesome?

I don’t really know what to write, so here goes… You don’t real think anyone would read one more fucking word, do you?

Not afraid to jump in the car and just take off to see the sites. At what speed? I don’t have to actually stop the car while you jump in, do I?

Those little things that make life different. Calling Needle dick! Dude, you’re up.

Let’s meet for coffee and see what we have in common. Since I don’t drink coffee, we are off to a rousing start. Let’s meet for Cuervo shots and do the nasty!

This feature was inspired by Mimi Lenox’s Dating Profile of the Day Used with permission.