Welcome again to Stealing which we bring you weekly on The WTIT Blog. We have gotten really good at just stealing a meme from someone else’s post. (You can play this meme with Judd and click on the official Sunday Stealing meme.) Today we ripped this meme off from a blogger called Carmen at the blog Mom to the Screaming Masses. She states that she lifted the meme from Mim’s site. It was probably stolen by the author of that blog, as well. Usually, what we steal is stolen as well. We have this attitude because we believe we are just smarter by calling our theft “A Feature”. All meme questions are in bold.
Cheers to all us thieves!
2. How do you style your hair? If you just would say “cut” what style is it? Judd. I thought you edited out ridiculous questions. Nice job, my friend. It is cut. I call it “normal”. Geez.
3. What’s your least favorite Christmas song? Any song in Latin. I actually like to understand the lyrics. With all do respect, why do we need to sing or chant in a language that no one has spoken since 3 AD. And singing in it? Let the dead stay dead.
4. How many colors are you wearing now? Purple passion undies. Blue eyes as deep as the ocean. Dark brown hair. Gongerling slacks. A very attractive light blue skintight dress shirt. And a fucking partridge in a pair tree. (Sorry. I just had to stop.)
5. Are you an introvert or extrovert? It has been said that I am an introverted extrovert. Or was that an extroverted introverted? Okay. Nobody has called me either of these. But, I do plead guilty to the extrovert shit.
6. What was the last book you read? Threesome: How to Fulfill Your Favorite Fantasy by Lori Gammon. While I found the anecdotes true to my own experience, I felt that the chapter on asking ladies during the threesomes about their sisters joining was not the most tasteful advice. For some reason, I do not think you should accept any advice on face value.
7. What’s one piece of fiction that changed your life? You gotta be fucking shitting me. If there is a Bozo on this bus that thinks one book can change their life, please let them out. Of both the bus and existence. And staple a sign to their back: Do Not Talk To! You’ve got to protect the normal folks.
8. If you are attracted to someone who is already in a relationship (or married), what might do you do? Gee. Kill my rival? Oh wait. I’ve now thought about this a bit. Go away and find somebody unattached. And yes Regis, that is my final answer.
9. Is there anything that has made you unhappy recently? My 401K is now worthless. My IRA was seized when The National Band of Iceland failed. My TV died two days ago. I haven’t had sex in two days. My ex-wives formed a club: Ex-wives of Budman. Boy were they pissed when I crashed their inaugural meeting.
10. What’s your favorite dessert? The French twins with Popsicles. I don’t know why, but I do enjoy watching them suck on one.
11. How long does it take you to get ready in the morning? Ready for what? For sex, I’d cleverly and subtlety slip out of my jammies. For work? A shave, a shower and my morning prayer to the Gods of Sexual Delights, gives me a well-balanced and realistic grip for my day. So I’d answer 55 minutes. Unless there is a naked woman in my bed. In that case, two days. Give or take.
12. Name one website that you visit daily. Why do you read it? Captain Kirk and She Hulk: Green Sex is Good Sex is a showstopper. Shatner before “Denny Crane” or “Raw Nerve”.
15. What was the last song to get stuck in your head? Happy Xmas (War is Over) by John Lennon. I have no idea why. Let’s face it; Christmas is at least three days away. Why should I already be in the spirit yet?
17. Pirates or Ninjas? Who the fuck cares?
18. What is your least favorite thing to do that you have to do everyday? Sex on demand. Not that I don’t love it. If you’ve read this blog before, you probably have guessed it. But then, if you try to tell the French twins, “I’m not in the mood.” Holy shit! Things can get ugly. I usually can deflect a major crisis by just giving in. After all, France is an ally. I’m just a sexy patriot.
19. Best time of your life? You almost had it. The title is actually “(I’ve Had) The Time of My Life”. Bill Medley & Jennifer Warnes sang it. Franke Previte, John DeNicola and Donald Markowitz wrote it. It was a hit in 1987 from the classic movie Dirty Dancing. Do you need to know anything else about the song?
20. What are you most looking forward to in the coming year? The most important things: Solve world hunger. End the energy crisis. Correct the Wall Street mess. Save the folks on Main Street that need their own bailout. End all wars. End discrimination. Overturn Prop 8 in California. Get the Governor of Illinois to go home. But the best? George W. goes with his Dickie.