27 comments on “The Grand Opening Sale

  1. I had to read Melville’s words out loud to fully understand them; my dog looked at me like I was crazy.

    “If your neighbor slaps you today, turn the other cheek. Tomorrow, shoot his ass.”

    Hahahahaaa, that’s priceless advice.

    Welcome to blogworld, Harvey. Glad you’re here to make it crazier.

  2. Good grief…This is plain scary as heck. Bwahahahahaha. Have a great Halloween and weekend Bud. 🙂

  3. Great to meet you Harvey, Matchmaker Extraordinarre.

    Maybe you can find a girl for Goober next? So him & Melville can double-date.

  4. TWO Star Trek references from Randolph??????


    No way is any girl going out with him with TWO references….sheesh

    Nice start there Banger…I am a friend of Bud’s so I figure I can call ya Banger…ya know…like we are buds too! .. Not bud…but buds…ya know like friends…buddies…get it?

  5. Lizza

    Thanks for the welcome. I have new screaming neighbors from India and I’m trying to get one of them to slap me so I can take my own advice.

  6. TT&T

    Thanks. I'm looking forward to getting to know me better, too. So far I feel a little like Randolph.

  7. Hey Shannon

    Nice to meet you, too. So you were in the Hick Hubby Club, were you?

    Happy Halloween back!

  8. Bond

    Banger? I hardly know her. Nice touch with the double posts about the two references. Was that on purpose?

  9. Melville should have taken his life savings of $100 and bought a Dolly Partin blow-up doll for company before the sophisticated girl ran off with his money. It would have saved him some trouble and filled his nights with “sumthin to t play wid” too!

    Now he’ll have to spend his life at the Waffle house with the rest of the flat pancakes of the world.
    What was he thinking??!

  10. Kimber

    Tell Bud. Maybe he’ll give me a raise. No, never mind. He’ll say, “How does 50% sound.” And that would be nothing.

    Thanks for checking out the post. And thanks for the note.

  11. Mimi

    I think you should take up backwoods financial planning. Y’all got a knack for it. I’m not sure the blow-up doll would work for Melville, though. He doesn’t want sophisticated, but according to him, “Ah stil lahk em ejukated.”

  12. I am with Bond, ya had me with the two Trekkie references. I go on record as being a Trek Girl not a Wars Girl.

    All was good until the WaHo line. Then I shed bitter Yankee tears due to my lack of chicken and eggs =(

    Nice matchmakin ;0

  13. Starrlight Starrbright
    I’d help you out with the chicken and eggs, but with the delivery, I’m sure which comes first.

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