Brenda Crossmouth is the head of the Connecticut Loves John McCain 2008 committee. She desired a forum and an interview on WTIT Tape Radio. After we explained to her that no one can hear WTIT unless you are in our studio, she asked how many people that was. We said four. We lied about three of them. She reluctantly asked if she could be interviewed on our WTIT Blog instead. Our head of all things political, Bud Weiser, was chosen for the task.
Bud: Welcome, Ms. Crossmouth. You love John McCain. Why?
Brenda: He’s not that moron Obama.
Bud: You think Obama is a moron?
Brenda: Actually thought he was a brilliant speaker when I first heard him. Great ideas. Full of enthusiasm.
Bud: What changed?
Brenda: (whispers) He’s black, ya know.
Bud: You needn’t whisper. Obama knows he’s black.
Brenda: Then all these black people are saying, “It’s our turn now, whitey.” I mean WE have to be SO careful when talking to them, but do they care how they talk to us? NNNOOO! I mean I know they were born here so technically blacks are Americans…
Brenda: Well, they aren’t native. They came here.
Bud: Brenda, everybody but Native Americans “came here”. And don’t you remember that itsy bitsy fact that they did not choose to come here. They were brought here as slaves.
Brenda: Nobody asked me about it. I would have stood up and said, “We need white slaves.”
Bud: Back to Obama. You called him a moron. Why?
Brenda: He’s running for President in Germany for chrissakes. They don’t vote. (whispers) Do they?
Bud: Well yes, but not for the American president. And I do admit, I have idea why a quarter of a million Germans came to see him speak either.
Brenda: And would he put his hand over his heart for the pledge allegiance to the flag?
Bud: That’s not a law,
Brenda: And how long did it take the mother to wear a flag pin? There oughta be a law.
Bud: About everyone wearing flag pins?
Brenda: No for people running for president to wear them. Especially for Muslims.
Bud: Obama isn’t a Muslim.
Brenda: That’s what they want you to believe. But I’ve seen pictures…
Bud: You mean that political cartoon in the New Yorker magazine? It was suppose to be a joke.
Brenda: It wasn’t funny.
Bud: No, you are right there. It was racist and disgusting.
Brenda: And I betcha he’s in tight with terrorists.
Bud: I think that’s a stretch. Anyway, have you nothing to say about John McCain.
Brenda: He is NOT Obama.
Bud: I know. He’s Bush, but older. A lot older. Do you like Bush?
Brenda: Worst President ever.
Bud: So what policies do you think McCain would adopt of Bush’s?
Brenda: Probably all of them.
Bud: And you want to support McCain why?
Brenda: He’s not Obama.
Bud: If I know my Obamas, I think he is the only one. So no other reason?
Brenda: (whispers) He is white. He won’t bring all of those militant Negroes in with him.
Bud: So you are afraid of African Americans?
Brenda: (laughing) Well, duh. All whites should be.
Bud: Even Obama’s mother?
Brenda: She is white? She doesn’t look white on that magazine cover.
Bud: Brenda, stay with me here. That’s a cartoon of his wife. She’s black. His dad is black and his mother is white.
Brenda: God, he looks all black!
Bud: Who should he look like?
Brenda: Derek Jeter. You know he’s white.
Bud: His mother is white and his dad is black.
Brenda: No shit?
Bud: No shit.
Brenda: Then I’d vote for McCain to be Captain of the Yankees, too. Thanks for pointing that out. Bud: You think there’s no shot that an Obama administration would shed a new light on our standing in the world?
Brenda: Oh, sure it would help. But we’d lose “freedom fries”.
Bud: No one still calls them that. I don’t think anyone ever did.
Brenda: Well, we should. Then at McDonald’s they would make more money.
Bud: How’s that?
Brenda: Well, silly, if you’re asked, “Do you want freedom with that” who’d say no?
Bud: Who’d say yes? I think you’d say, “huh?”
Brenda: Well, maybe. It was a thought.
Bud: You do much of that, do you?
Brenda: What, you mean “think”? You son of a bitch!
Bud: We spent an awful amount of valuable blog space for you to tell us to vote for McCain cause he is white.
Brenda: And more experienced…
Same time. Same blog.