Eliot Spitzer resigned after this interview. He sent WTIT the letter below our interview.
News item: New York Governor Eliot Spitzer who was once considered “Mr. Clean” and the Attorney General that attacked Wall Street abuses, is tied to a prostitution ring. With his wife by his side he apologized to the people of New York and to his family. He neglected to say what he was apologizing for, so he knew he needed clarification. Governor Spitzer decided that the WTIT Tape Radio Blog should conduct his first post-pro interview. When news breaks, the WTIT Blog sometimes stumbles upon it. WTIT assigned the interview to Senior Political Correspondent Bud Weiser.
Bud: Good day, Governor Spitzer. You apologized to your family and to the great people of New York but didn’t say for what.
Bud: Yes, what?
Spitzer: Yes I apologized.
Spitzer: I think you know.
Bud: This reminds me of Jason Giambi’s apology to Yankee fans. While we all knew it was for ‘roids, he never said it.
Spitzer: Because the Yanks legally could have voided his contract. That would have cost Giambi millions of dollars. So a wink, wink “I’m sorry” approach was excellent from a legal standpoint. (Whispers) It’s where I got the idea.
Bud: This is a blog interview. Why are you whispering?
Spitzer: So my wife doesn’t hear any more about it.
Bud: How many prostitutes have you been with?
Spitzer: I really can’t say.
Bud: You are an attorney yourself. Is this legal advice?
Spitzer: Oh, no. My attorneys don’t have a problem with me admitting I’ve done a prostitute. It would be hard to deny. But your question was, “how many”. How many stars are in the sky… How many grains of sand are on a beach…
Bud: Just say a fucking lot.
Spitzer: Well in round numbers, yes lots.
Bud: OK, I’m a bit lost here. Why are you doing this interview?
Spitzer: Everybody knows that no one reads your lame excuse for a blog. You swear, show pictures of scantily clad women…if I were still an Attorney General I’d shut you down. This blog is one big eye sore in my judgment.
Bud: And you’ve shown excellent judgment.
Spitzer: Did you see my wife? She looked like “Night of the Living Dead” next to me during my press conference.
Bud: I think the public assumed she was in shock. After finding out her husband, “Mr. Clean” does prostitutes and had the ladies cross state lines and faces serious federal charges, might she have the right to appeared stunned?
Spitzer: It was all her fucking fault.
Bud: Governor, you are swearing in my blog.
Spitzer: And I fuck prostitutes. Not much left for me to worry about. But if your reader was offended, have his people call my people. We know where the hot chicks are.
Bud: It was your wife’s fault?
Spitzer: Look, I married her when she was twenty-two. She was young and hot with breasts so firm…
Bud: Governor, you’ve got three daughters. Can you tone it down a bit?
Spitzer: Whatever. So my wife got old. “Night of the Living Dead” old, at that. So here is my legal argument: I married her because she was hot and twenty-two…
Bud: With firm breasts…
Spitzer: Exactly. So she got older and I don’t even want to look at her now. She broke the contract.
Bud: By getting older?
Spitzer: Yea. Who’d figure? I just need a twenty-two year old. Then. Now, forever.
Bud: What do you think your endorsement does for Hillary Clinton?
Spitzer: Fuck her.
Bud: You did?
Spitzer: You don’t pay attention at all. No wonder no one reads your damn blog. Is Hillary twenty-two?
Bud: And her breasts?
Spitzer: Trust me. Not at all firm.
Bud: How would you know that?
Spitzer: I’ve contributed a lot to her campaign.
Bud: Including STDs?
Spitzer: That is probably a lock, for sure. But please, Bud. When you publish it, can you spin it and clean it up a bit so I look really sorry to the people of New York, my daughters and my wife?
Bud: We can agree on that. You look really sorry for a guy who was supposed to clean things up. So when are you resigning?
Spitzer: You really think it will come to that?
Bud: Governor, are paying attention to anything?
Spitzer: My Client 9 account and Kristen who has the nicest pair off…
Bud: Spitzer, someone will show you out of the studio. I mean quickly. NOW! Meanwhile, I think I’m getting sick. I’m Bud Weiser and that’s the way it isn’t, on March 12, 2008.
So that is that for WTIT: The Blog on a Hump Day. Oops, that’s perhaps a bad choice of words. Anyway, we will return to this very spot in the blogosphere with something perhaps in better taste. Or not. There really is no telling. We were told again today that this blog is an “aquired taste”. So, you go do the aquire thing, and we will come up with a post. Right here.
Same time. Same blog.